bronwynrh | Validation. . . It's a Good Thing (TM)

So it turns out the boss agrees with me that the wall, of whom I spoke yesterday, is indeed a difficult wall with which to work.

I left the lab last night, very upset. The wall felt my "aura" was negative and that I was nasty. So, instead of telling the wall that I was frustrated with her for not listening to me and that yes, I get frustrated when I explain and explain and still don't get the satisfaction of knowing that my message has been heard. . . I took the blame, apologized for hurting her feelings, told her it was not my intention and explained that I'm under a lot of pressure. So when I ask her to read first, THEN ask questions, THEN act, I mean it and it really will make the wall's rotation go more smoothly.

As many such interactions between women do, our discussion ended with eyes-welled up and a hug.

I was angry this morning that I'd taken the blame for something that wasn't my fault, but I know that it was probably the best way to handle the situation at the time.

My boss asked me today if my working with the wall was going to be a problem. We sat and discussed the wall and my developing ideas about teaching, at which point I found out that I am, indeed, following the right track, that my frustration was fully justified and that the wall is, indeed, a rather difficult wall.

My other frustration yesterday (gawd what an aggravating day was yesterday) was caused by Mr. Unbathed Fuzzy-Ears. Mr. UFE likes to loiter nearby when other people are having a conversation, and then he likes to butt in with his opinion of how things should be.

Now, we're not talking about a "Oh, yeah, I saw that, blah blah." No. What we're talking about is a 5 or 10 or even 30 minute exposition on what he thinks, why he thinks it, and why we are taking a great risk if we disagree.

I'm not exaggerating.

So I'm talking to the wall, explaining a procedure to her and detailing the things she will need to prepare in order to do the procedure. Mr. UFE (loitering as usual, even after I pointedly ask, "May I help you?" and get a response in the negative) pipes in and tells the wall that she can do it much more quickly if she uses X shortcut.

You know, the shortcut that could ruin her experiment? The one that's irresponsible? Yeah, that shortcut.

Long story short, the boss knows Mr. UFE is a frequent buttinsky and that he really shouldn't be butting in when I am directly responsible for the work and supervision of the wall. So, boss is going to have a talk with Mr. UFE - he's gonna tell UFE to butt out.

Boss also tells me that Mr. UFE's personal and intellectual habits are precisely why boss trusts ME with students, rather than UFE. Apparently, UFE needs to work on his discourse and teaching styles (as if THAT'll ever happen).

This may sound like I'm in a pissy mood and that I'm complaining, but I'm actually feeling quite good about myself now. I guess I really do need that validation, especially when it comes to the sorts of problems I've been confronted with recently.

I just thought I would share my tale with you (whoever you may be). I'm sure most of us have found ourselves on one side or the other of this situation.

So I'll sign off today with two thoughts. . .

1) TGIF!!!
2) Longest Post Yet!